Lucid Dreams

"The worst mistake that you can make is to think you're alive when really you're asleep in life's waiting room"

Itu adalah salah satu quote favorite gw... namun jujur aja, sampai skrg gw ga tau maksud filosofis di balik kata-kata itu sebenernya apa... a simple conclusion that can be pulled out of the mind-twisting movie WAKING LIFE, film dimana quote itu muncul, adalah salah satu tanda tanya besar, yang juga menjadi salah satu quote lain di film tersebut, "they say a dream feels real only when it lasts... could you say the same thing about life?"




Heuhh... rasanya gakkan ada habisnya kalau lagi-lagi gw ngebahas tentang betapa 'tidak-nyata' atau 'semu'- nya hidup ini... fyi, my wildest imagination once told me bahwa sebenernya kehidupan sehari-hari yang gw jalani adalah sebuah mimpi panjang yang terasa nyata... jadi, ketika gw mandi, belajar, main bola, atau nulis blog ini, it's just a long-lasting dream yang entah kapan akan berhenti, but someday it will come to an end... a little religious, huh?

well, i don't wanna go into a religious pep-talk like what the preachers say di salat Jumat or kuliah subuh, tapi alangkah senangnya diri gw ketika setelah menjadi penikmat film dan entertainment, banyak filmmaker ternyata mengambil isu ini sebagai tema utama karya mereka... gw paling ingat salah satu episode MAC GYVER yang di endingnya ternyata sejam penuh episode itu hanya berupa mimpi si Mac Gyver... lalu, ada salah satu versi (fan fiction?) DORAEMON yang menceritakan bahwa keberadaan Doraemon ternyata hanya ada di dalam mimpi super-panjang si Nobita (sekaligus mimpi buruk buat seluruh anak penggemar Doraemon, hahaha...), setelah itu, of course THE MATRIX, yang jelas-jelas mempertanyakan kehidupan nyata- tidak nyata serta segala perdebatan di dalamnya... ada lagi NEXT dimana setengah film ternyata hanya vision-nya Nicolas Cage... yang terakhir, tentu saja WAKING LIFE yang amat-sangat fenomenal, namun sayangnya jarang terdengar di telinga pecinta film di Indonesia...

but after all, gw ga pernah menyangka bahwa ternyata salah satu ketakutan terbesar gw berkutat di seputar mimpi... yes, would u guess that what happens in the movie WAKING LIFE ternyata bisa terjadi juga di kehidupan nyata? well, ini urusan orang-orang psikologi, namun yang jelas, kondisi dimana seseorang ketika sedang bermimpi, menyadari bahwa dia sedang mimpi namun tidak bisa keluar ke kenyataan yang sebenarnya, disebut 'Lucid Dream'... inilah yang menjadi fokus di film WAKING LIFE... dan itu jugalah yang selama ini menjadi ketakutan terbesar gw...

then the big question will always remain,

"The worst mistake that you can make is to think you're alive when really you're asleep in life's waiting room"

what's that supposed to mean?

H.E.L.P.!!!

MY FIRST SHORT STORY...

Tristan exhaled. Throwing out heavy breaths is all he had been doing. He stared solemnly to the aged couple standing in front of him. They had been holding hands, just like they never wanted to let each other go. Tristan hated to admit, but he envied them. The couple looked so romantic. The man, a nearly bald-headed mid-50s, spent couple times stroking his woman’s long wavy hair. As a respond, she never stopped giving him the ‘you-complete-me’ look. Smiles never left the faces of them both.

Then the elevator dinged. The couple left Tristan alone again inside the cold 4x4-square room. He folded his arm on his chest then breathed heavily once again. He started to think he was going crazy.

‘I guess I really am’, he said to himself. ‘What the hell am I doing here? Standing inside an elevator for almost two hours, going up and down without ever getting off? Keep looking at various kinds of people who come in and out? I must be out of my mind!’

But then seconds later, something caught his attention. Two young girls, probably the same ages as his, stepped into the elevator. Both of them were cute, but the only one that attracted him was the one with long black hair and deep look inside beautiful dark eyes. Tristan froze. He never saw such a beauty.

The girl seemed to ignore him. She was too busy chatting with her friend, the curly one. In fact, it was the curly one who did all the talking. The long-haired was just acting as a good listener.

Tristan glanced at her full body, from the tip of her toes to the end of her hair. He adored how she looks. In fact, he wanted to be with her. But then a second thought just crossed his mind. He had to remember that he had enough with girls. ‘They just caused you madness and confusion,’ his gloomy thought said.

But suddenly the girl started to talk to the curly one, and what Tristan heard on what she said really amazed him. It began with a simple question that she asked the curly one, right after the elevator started to go up.

‘Hey, Nora, have you watched Serendipity?’

‘Are you saying that silly movie with John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale?’

‘Yes, it is. But it is not silly, you know.’

Nora giggled. ‘Then what are you trying to say, Diana? That it is the most romantic chic-flick you’ve ever seen?’

Tristan kept the name inside his mind. Diana, what a name!

‘Hey, I do believe it is romantic,’ Diana protested. ‘I really love it. Even though there are too many coincidences on the scenes, but it’s the coincidence that makes it romantic!’

‘I haven’t watched it. But what’s ‘serendipity’ anyway?’

‘It’s something related to… you know, destiny. I see that all the coincidences in fact tries to say that sometimes just comes along. You don’t look for it. But then sometimes it just comes back. I think that’s what happens with love.’

Nora started to laugh, ‘listen to yourself, honey! Isn’t it a little too hard to be discussed inside an elevator?’

Suddenly there’s a funny look inside Diana’s look. ‘In that movie, it started inside an elevator, you know, where the guy and the girl meet and started to test whether their love can come along with serendipity.’

Tristan enjoyed what he heard. He loved the enchanting sound of Diana’s voice when expressing her smart thinking about love.

Suddenly, the elevator stopped. It started to shake like the earth was having an earthquake. The two girls started to panic. Tristan tried to steady himself and kept it cool, while actually he felt a little panic inside himself as well.

Then the so-called serendipity, which Diana had been talking about, happened in a quite funny way. Diana pulled her body to the elevator’s wall, and said something, which sounded more like a joke than an expression of panicky.

‘Help, I don’t wanna die! I haven’t been married!’ she said with small giggles and a smile.

Seeing that expression, Tristan guessed that this elevator quake usually happens. But then without realizing what he did, Tristan suddenly approached the long-haired girl then gave her his hand.

‘Marry me, now!’

At the same time, the quake stopped. Silence fulfilled the whole room. The two girls exchanged stares. They could not believe what this strange guy just said, especially Diana.

Tristan realized this effect of strange awkwardness was caused by his spontaneous reaction, so he tried to play it cool. He tried his best to smile, and without pulling his hand back, he said it loud and clear.

‘My name is Tristan.’

Diana was stunned, but then she welcomed that guy’s hand and said her name. Next to her, Nora rolled her eyes.

But no one noticed Nora’s demeaning expression. The most important effect that happened that day was the turning-back to both Tristan and Diana’s life. Tristan found a girl that probably his whole life he had been looking for. For Diana, she ended up her long journey in questioning the existence of love. That was the first time this new couple start to believe in love, and how amazed they were when they found out that it could start in a very simple thing, which almost feels like nothing.

It’s what called ‘serendipity'

P.S. : I Miss You (?)

i wished for a man who can understand. and he's more than that.
i wished for a man who won't feel intimidate by me. and he's glad for what i had.
i wished for a man who can keep my feet on the ground. and sometimes he still taking me fly away.
i wished for a man who knows what he want. and not neglecting what i need.
i wished for a man who says the words "I love you" and not making me scare. and somehow i can say "I love you too" without any fear.
i wished for a man who let me do things i want. and knowing he will always there if i make mistake or simply failed.
i wished for a man who know that i am somehow a skeptic girl. and he said "Relax, lets find out together".

i wished for a man, not so much like you, but you're more than what i ever wished.
honey, thank you.